“The way we were treated as small children is the way we treat ourselves the rest of our lives, and we often impose our most agonising suffering upon ourselves.” — Alice Miller (1987, p.133)

The First 1,000 Days – Why They Matter More Than We Realise  We often talk about childhood shaping the adult self, but there’s a particular window of time – conception through to around age three – that’s quietly doing some of the heaviest lifting in human development. Neuroscientists call it “the first 1,000 days”. Attachment…

(Even When the Client Is 58) At some point in attachment-informed practice, many counsellors have a quiet realisation. The client sitting in front of us may be an adult – articulate, capable, reflective – and yet something else is present too. A fear that feels too big.A longing that feels strangely young.A reaction that seems…

Attachment-Based Therapy Isn’t “Too Abstract”—Here’s How Neuroscience Makes It Practical  If you’ve ever dismissed attachment-based therapy as too abstract or “theoretical,” you’re not alone. It’s easy to feel that way when terms like secure attachment, internal working models, or attachment styles are thrown around in ways that sound more academic than actionable. But here’s the…

(What Might That Be Protecting?) Many counsellors say it – sometimes confidently, sometimes cautiously: “I don’t really do inner child work.” It’s often followed by a rationale: These concerns are understandable. Inner child work has, at times, been poorly taught, loosely defined, or practiced without enough containment. And yet, from an attachment-informed perspective, it’s worth…

(Why This Is Where Attachment Work Truly Lives) There’s a common misconception in therapy that change happens in moments of insight. A realisation lands.A pattern makes sense.A link to childhood becomes clear. These moments matter – but in attachment-informed work, they’re rarely where the deepest healing occurs. That happens somewhere else entirely. It happens in…

If you’ve ever sat with a client and quietly thought, “Ah… this is an old dance they’ve been doing since childhood,” then you’re already brushing up against one of the most elegant and compassionate models in the attachment world: the Circle of Security. Whether you’re a parent, a therapist, a supervisor, or simply a human…