“The way we were treated as small children is the way we treat ourselves the rest of our lives, and we often impose our most agonising suffering upon ourselves.” — Alice Miller (1987, p.133)

When Expectation Meets Reality Therapists spend a lot of time helping clients make sense of disappointment — that aching gap between what we hoped for and what is. But if we’re honest, we’re not immune to it ourselves. We expect to feel centred and compassionate every day, to know what we’re doing, to manage our…

Gordon Neufeld’s beautiful words offer a simple but profound truth about human development: “To foster independence we must first invite dependence… We liberate children not by making them work for our love but by letting them rest in it.” Most parents instinctively feel the wisdom in this, even if the world around them sometimes encourages…

When Daughters Become Mothers: The Attachment Story Behind the Pram  When a daughter becomes a mother, it isn’t just a change in role, it’s a seismic shift in the heart, the mind, and often the sense of self. It’s a chapter where the past, present, and future meet in the smallest of bundles. Recently, I…

(Why Going Slowly Is Often the Most Powerful Intervention) There’s a quiet pressure many counsellors feel – even if they don’t name it. That therapy should go somewhere.That something should happen.That emotional release equals progress. And when clients carry trauma, there can be an added, unspoken belief:If we don’t access the pain fully, are we…

Recently, I’ve been watching my little angel, aka sausage, my two-year-old granddaughter, navigate the enormous transition of becoming a big sister. It’s been a front-row seat to the sibling dance: the tug-of-war between love and curiosity, excitement and jealousy, all wrapped in a tiny body with even tinier words to express it. There have been…